I picked up two more books a few days ago that aren't on the Kindle Store (fucking bullshit, I know -- I didn't pay all this money for an Ego Tablet to not be able to read everything I want immediately all the time): The Heart Of The Matter[4] by Graham Greene and A Heartbreaking Work Of Staggering Genius[5] by Dave Eggers. I'm gonna do Heart first and then dive right into Genius.
But before that, I'm going to predict the plots of these books based entirely on their front and back covers.
Oh No The Back Covers Don't Have Any Plot Information
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| The Heart Of The Matter |
I REALLY WANT THERE TO BE ELVES IN THIS BOOK
NOT NECESSARILY LIKE LEGOLAS BUT DEFINITELY IN THAT VEIN
Also talking clouds? Talking clouds are in like zero things. What the hell, collective creative consciousness? Are you telling me I just had an idea that literally zero[7] people have had before? I didn't even have to think about it. Shit, name one of them Nimbus. You're welcome.
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| A Heartbreaking Work . . . |
In the interest of full disclosure I have to say that I sort of know the general idea behind Genius. Dave's parents get cancer and die and he's got to take care of his brother. Something like that -- maybe his brother isn't of an age where he needs to be taken care of. Maybe all of us always need to be taken care of. Maybe . . .
FAAARRTTSSSSSSS
No but really I'm pumped to read both of these books in spite of these totally dickish "summaries." I've heard nothing but good things about Eggers[8] and MVP is just Da Best and I trust her implicitly.
Plus they'll have plots -- definitely at least Heart -- so if nothing else you'll all get to read me making an ass of myself some more.
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[1] Written for Rolling Stone, "Up, Simba" is about the week (I think) DFW spent on the John McCain 2000 campaign. His analysis of Young Voters and how a population's apathy towards the democratic process can be used by a campaign to its advantage is really interesting. It's also written in a style I can only describe as "rapid," with some sentences running longer than a page.* You can pick up just this essay, weirdly enough -- it is over 60 pages* long -- on Amazon or read it on a shadily-illegitimate pdf-scanning website. Google it, click on the second one, and TELL NO ONE I SENT YOU.
[2] Written for Gourmet Magazine, this one's about the Maine Lobster Festival but it also delves into the morality of boiling a living animal. It's not too heavy-handed, either: his case is more objective and ends on a skeptical note. Again, it is also very funny. It's even available on Gourmet's website! Free! Read it!
[3] Completely unrelated but also something I heavily recommend: Frank Ocean's new album, Channel Orange, was released today. That link there will play the whole thing through -- give it some of your time. "Sweet Life" is an early favorite.
[4] Via the lovely MVP.
[5] Mind-reading recommendation from SB.
[6] My friend MS and I once tried to write a novel modeled after -- stolen from -- Toni Morrison and the jury's still out on whether it was (A) racist or (B) oddly transcendent. We finished roughly two-thirds of the first page.
[7] Zero people have worked talking clouds into books, at least. It's worth noting that I've read every book in the history of ever and speak from high authority.
[8] From CP, SB, JL; Klosterman said he re-defined the memoir genre.
[*] Is a Kindle page the same as a normal page? I don't think so. They feel shorter, but that obviously isn't an objective measurement. (Also yes I did just put a footnote in a footnote do you want to say it to my face.)
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